Sunday, 27 October 2013

An Urgent Call

Feeling all restless and worked up. All the hours taken to revise and keep revising has made me felt even more droggy and needless to say, how haggard I have been looking lately. Stuck in front of the laptop and glued to my seat for hours aren't my forte. My life is in a chaos and complete mess. This happens when the epiphany comes late and to cram everything in a week isn't a good choice. However, there is no other choices left, and have to settle with this every one. It's better late than never to start buck up and step on the gas.

Sabr and Stay strong!

Not even half way through and before everything bottles up to a point of melting, I, then decide I really need a booster to keep me motivated to carry on when not a thing I do makes me feel any better. A cure to this seasonal epidemic. And so I call my mummy. I am not wrong and in fact, it is the best decision ever. Mummy always knows how to motivate me and thus eradicate the resentment that rested heavily in my heart. She knows me all too well and undoubtedly, her magical words sooth me, my restless heart and mind like a magician reads mantra while waving his magic wand. In a split second, all the pain and stress is gone in the thin air. I need no reason to love you forever and always!

Mummy, May you and dad are always in the best of health and iman! 

Saturday, 26 October 2013

It's here, can't you smell it?

Sometimes we need to consign ourselves to the fate and accepting the fact that thing is as it is. Like, next week is the start of final exam of this very semester. Dang! Try to rub my eyes in disbelief and bang my head to the wall just in case I am still daydreaming, but heck, reality kicks in and a river of tears wouldn't change the fact that next week I'll be sitting for my first exam paper. Time waits no man. Waiting for the study mode to kick away the laziness in me and thus possesses my inner side is like waiting for the airplane to arrive at the bus station. Oh bummer!

But fret not, the turmoil will be over in the matter of 2 weeks or so. Heaven much? Better yet, wait till you hear this part, that is the best part of all being Jan 2012 intake is finishing exam earlier than anyone else which means extra holidays. Shoot! Whose in the right mind doesn't love extra days of semester break? Come on. Lets toss and cheers to this newsflash! 

On a more serious note, exam always freaks me out to think of my bad performances in the last few semesters. Few days before any tests, I get clammy and claustrophobic, worry for nothing. That's so me. Yet again it's all rezeki fixed by Allah, worth the effort I gave, no regrets. Not that we don't need any talisman or good luck charms for this exam, all we need from you all out there is sincere prayers from the hearts because it is the best gift of all. Hopefully, we will do just fine and pass this semester with exceptional result, Aminn.

To everyone out there in the same boat with me, wishing you all the very best and may the strongest force be with you.

May Allah ease our journey, Aminn.

# Feeling extremely droggy, a combination of drowsiness and grogginess and boy, this cold wind and windy weather bring the overflowing urge to sleep. In any second, I shall mellow myself in the cocoon of loneliness disguising itself as a fluffy duvet that keep me warm from cold and keep me company every night.  

Friday, 25 October 2013

Tales Alive

I was nowhere near a good storyteller. I used to join storytelling competition, representing my school, but that was a century ago back then in primary school. and the environment and ambiance was a whole lot different than today. As luck had it, this semester, I had to deal with a course entitled, Stories for Young Learners which carried 3 credits, which was a lot and there was no space to fool around in this course considering that sum of credit. Studying different genres of story was one part and to do storytelling simulation in class which really made me cold feet was another part. Mostly I enjoyed every minute I spent in the class. But the best part of all was, boy was I surprised to know that I was shortlisted to be one of finalists for intrabatch storytelling competition.

On a side note, to my surprise, it seemed to be that I still had the storytelling soul in me though there were lot of loopholes to be ameliorated with the most. Frankly speaking I wasn't doing that good enough to expect and earn a string quartet, fireworks, or even drum rolls to mark this little achievement which was again nothing to be prided of. So last Wednesday, we had this competition held at one of the lecture halls in our campus with the theme, Tales Alive. The perk was, it was mandatory for everyone and I really meant everyone to wear costumes on that day and it was such a brilliant idea to have everyone overdressed or gone dandy once in a while for a good cause. Plus, it coincided with Halloween celebration, not that i celebrated it as it was against my belief but it was just a random thought that fleeted through my mind. 

As it was a huge deal for me, this thing made me took a big gulp of nervousness and vomited fear. I envisioned the possibility of me having had a series of humiliating events on the stage like fainted upon seeing a large crowd of people in the hall with their eyes all on me like zombies demanded heads (not to mention, the presence of real school kids just to watch us performed which doubled my anxiety), drenched in sweat as my uncontrollable nervousness escalated, or hardly uttered any words due to sudden Parkinson strike. What if all of a sudden, I forgot my lines? What was I supposed to do? Knew it too well I was aggrandizing too much over a small matter. Yet again it was the matter of 7 minutes for god sake and everything could happen during that stipulated time. However, my lucky star wasn't with me and I did not win any places. But fret not, the experiences itself was the greatest reward of all. After all, no regrets, I had tried my very best and accepted the fact that there were others who were way better than me in this thing. I did learn lot of valuables things from this participation, especially from the feedback received from the lecturer on how to be a good storyteller, a crucial skill that a language teacher must have. This was a golden opportunity worth to seize in order to improve and edify myself before I embarked on my journey into teaching world. Kudos to all the winners!       

Told ya! Everyone dressed up to the nine. Now try to spot me. good luck! 

Wednesday, 16 October 2013

Why oh Why

Wasn't it always the way, the book you recently read seemed to have a strong connection with whatever angst adulthood drama you just have. There were certain things in life that you wished it never happened. but, somehow, out of your control and will, it just happened. And things started to change bit by bit. The metamorphosis was painstaking. The worst was you never seemed comfortable with it, so how to endure this without having needed to suffer acute emotional inertia?

Surely though it never started that way, but it really was my fault for I'd been lying some very personal stuff that I should have kept it tight in the closet. There was a need for me to be more vigilant and careful next time with whatever I was about to utter. So did it ever occur to you that some people misinterpreted what you were telling? Countless times, to put it in an easier way, they didn't get my jokes. They should have known me all too well that I joke a lot. Well, what was worst than a colossal misunderstanding about myself. Now that everything was pretty much a spoiled broth. there was nothing much I could do about it but to settle with whatever that was left and consign myself to my fate. All I could do now was to glean real courage and to swallow my own pride in order to man up wrong things and clear the water of misunderstanding.  

Mostly sorry for am not trying to be forlorn on these auspicious days, but it saddens me to think that I blow the one and only chance I have. *tsk

"I believe everything happens for a reason and I must be strong. In every bad ordeal, there must be a silver lining or rainbow awaits at the end of the tunnel."     

Monday, 7 October 2013

Giveaway from MessySerabut

Ola! For I was a bit on hiatus on this site lately, I totally blame the coming test and all that seem to drag me away from spilling whatever it is I like to say in here.

Let me get this straight. A friend of mine, MessySerabut is organising a giveaway contest and I think everybody should give it a shot. Stand a chance to win cool merchandises. But of course, terms and conditions are applied. For more details, click on the picture and you will be directed to the aforementioned blog. 

Wait no more! Come and give it a try, who knows the lucky star might be with you. :D

Sunday, 6 October 2013

Bread and Butter

Because things are going pretty wild these days, writing has never failed to give me the therapy that i'm always seeking. Name it, free writing or leisure writing, they shall be my bread and butter. I like watching my fingers make their dancing moves on the keyboard, typing away whatever that hoards within. Whether it rains or storms, it is there for me, verbalizing my every feeling and thought that fleet through my mind, helping me a lot to dance in the rain. On a more serious note, entertaining me when even an ice cream fails to lift the resentment that rested in my heart. Just so you know, it just feels so good to be able to lash everything out. There you go, I say it.