Can someone replace me??
Friday, 31 December 2010
Do not love me yet, for I
Am still a slender moon,
A scimitar about the heart
Too sharp to touch too soon.
Before I’m touched I need to grow
More full in golden light;
I need to smile upon my earth
And rule some patch of night.
I need to know what roads and fields
Lie in my domain
And dull my brand new ecstasies
With sophomoric pain.
I need the love of some blank girl
More cold and white than me,
That we might grope in ignorance
And fear of what might be.
And then, when I’m a silver bowl
And know what I can hold,
Then, then, perhaps, we could try love
If you are not too old.
p/s: I don't know how to keep this feeling anymore..Really, I do like you very much..and know well the big difference that we have..you are half an angel while me, am half of devil..
blink on and off..2010 has came to an end..and yet another year will come to replace its throne. Like most of us, we may say this year has passed by so fast like a speeding-bullet as if yesterday was the first day of 2010. Come on, open your eyes wide and see tomorrow will be a NEW YEAR of 2011.
Apart from this, of course, in 2010..I have endured so many things, gone through so many ups and down until where I'm standing at the moment.
So in short..this is what I have been going through this year:
1) SPM result-though not such an amazing result that I achieve, I satisfy most with what I receive..and mostly, I get what I target of.
2)UiTm-maybe some of are questioning when did I study there..and to tell you the truth, before I step my foot in ipg, I'm actually a TESLian at UiTM Kuantan..this place is having such a sentimental-value for me..the experience that I gain can't be compared with money..I love this place so much.
3)IPG Perlis Campus-so this is where I'm standing now, and if truth is told..at the first place, I refuse to accept the offer because really I have several reasons why I don't want to be there..and of course the secrets are safe in me..but at the end,there is where I'm now. Doing B.Ed TESL..and for sure an ENGLISH TEACHER in-the-making! GO TESL GO!
So...I guess those are the top three out of the so many achievements that I have achieved this year.
As for next year..I have several resolutions to be resolved:
1) targeting 3.80 and above for my exam..really, gonna work very hard on it.
2) trying my best to save money as I want to buy lot of things..first, new phone..new sweater..shopping books!
3) really working my best to change my attitude..this is quite...tet!
Okay..that's it..actually, there's so many more..but if I can write it out, it will be more than two or three pages. But, remember that's okay if you continue with your last year list as it's still new and fresh if you don't achieve what you have resoluted of.
And of course.
Happy New Year...May your year will be full of joys, wonders and happiness!
Thursday, 30 December 2010
Love is a sickness full of woes
All remedies refusing
A plant that most with cutting grows
Most barren with best using.
More we enjoy it, more it dies
If not enjoyed, it sighing cries
Love is a torment of the mind
A tempest everlasting
And Jove hath made it of a kind
Not well, nor full nor fasting.
More we enjoy it, more it dies
If not enjoyed, it sighing cries
As I'm going to make a long journey by bus this weekend..so, I guess it will be good if I can have a new sweater or perhaps a coat that can withstand the low temperature of the bus as if you're standing in the middle of snowy field in bare. Extremely cold, isn't??...Since it has been such a long time haven't My mum and I go shopping together..so, I tell her that really, I need a new sweater as the one that I have is old enough though I just buy it few months ago before I enter UiTM.
So, today we go shopping together..and after strolling up and down of the Econjaya, we end up buying a blazer for me! So contented! It was black in colour, plus thing that makes me like it very much is the pattern at the back. It's just awesome! Really, it makes me look like a Londoners! London, here I come! But poor me, dream is only a dream..okay, put it aside. Serious, I look pretty pro when wearing that blazer. Now, chill..no more. Thanks mum!
Wednesday, 29 December 2010
Ah! I remember well (and how can I but evermore remember well) when first our flame began, when scarce we knew what was the flame we felt..when as we sat and sighed..and looked upon each other, and conceived not what we ailed—yet something we did ail; And yet were well, and yet we were not well. And what was our disease we could not tell.
Then would we talk, then sigh, then look; and thus in that first garden of our simpleness..we spent our youthful vigors. But when years began to reap the fruit of knowledge, ah, how then would she with graver looks, with sweet, stern brow...check my presumption and my forwardness; Yet still would give me flowers, still would me show
What she would have me, yet not have me know.
There's a story that I can't ramp but can understand unconditionally.
Foolish love is only folly
Wanton love is too unholy
Greedy love is covetous
Idle love is frivolous
But the gracious love is it
That doth prove the work of wit.
Beauty but deceives the eye
Flattery leads the ear awry
Wealth doth but enchant the wit
Want, the overthrow of it
While in Wisdom's worthy grace
Virtue sees the sweetest face.
There hath Love found out his life,
Peace without all thought of strife
Kindness in Discretion's care
Truth, that clearly doth declare
Faith doth in true fancy prove,
Lust the excrements of Love.
Then in faith may fancy see
How my love may construèd be
How it grows and what it seeks
How it lives and what it likes
So in highest grace regard it,
Or in lowest scorn discard it.
p/s: I can't comprehend myself why do I turn head-over-heels on you..but trust me..I found myself in you..you complete me.
For real, it has been quite some time haven't I stepped my foot on library's land. To tell you the truth, since I study in ipg, it has been my companion, a place where I like to stay for hours, where my friends and I love to gather and share hot story-mory..and of course, a comfy palace where I like to take nape..don't you?? So,guess what, today, I went to the public library which is a stone away from my house. It isn't so gargantuan..yet, it will take you days to discover the whole floor. Basically, it is a double-story building, and making it's more extraordinary with red in colour with malay-ambiance architecture. So, i guess you will get the whole picture of it...understood.
We promise to be there at ten..and sharp at ten, i've been there..quite a new history as i readily love to come late. After that, as usual, contemplated by the thought that i was late, so i call my friend and guess what, they're still at home! Fudge! Ok, fine..it will keep waiting..but seriously, i hate to wait and waiting is such a cumbersome suffering-filled labyrinth. Not seeing their noses around make butterfly swirl around my belly. Orait, then after a few minutes..one by one show up their faces. So grin! We settle down at a corner in the library. Like most of the visitors, of course-lah we go there to study..not playing around. As one of us bring her lovely lappy, we open it and try to locate the internet connection. Much to our frustration, there's no internet wireless connection in here! OH...so shuck! Supposed, it must cater the internet connection for the convenient of the visitors.
Not to say that it's such an out-of-date library, but i could agree no more. It spoils our mission, but that's okay then we continue with our study. But, still we don't satisfied. Provoked by the government saying that we're now moving towards the internet country, so i bet the reality is worthless than the promises. We continue our study and at 1 we go home. Sayonara my friend!
p/s: sorry for the grammatical errors here and there.
Tuesday, 28 December 2010
There's no word blurted out from my mouth the moment I see my friends, my best friends since high school. It seems like the flashback of memories back then in school. And now every and each of us have grown enough and lead our own way. And today, since the last time we met if can recall during hari raya, so i guess this is the second time we met after a long time ever since we are no more school students and called as tertiary students. We met again today at our usual pit-stop, nowhere other than kfc. Already tired seeing the chicken that will make me look even more plump..uh, no way! Some of you may be baffled why do we seldomly meet, the only solid reason for this is that Distance! Think about it, amani, I used to call her pam lives far up to the north of besut, I can say almost to the outback of Besut, whilst amanina, a.k.a shortie settles down at far down to the southern of besut..isn't that will be cumbersome for us to meet anyhow. Yes, undoubtedly, friendship can't be compared with distance, come on, be realistic.
Okay, as for today, since the weather is unpredictable though it is predictable, it can catastrophe at any time, it has been raining quite heavily since last night, so we decide to just settle in kfc for a while. And worst is that they have been waiting for me since ten, sorry guys, but what can i do, i still got class, don't get me wrong..i'm teaching kids to tell you all the truth. Then, more or less, at 12 i landed my legs my kfc. Seeing the eager faces chill my pounding nervousness. We have our lunch..and later chat, and ramp and babble and gossip and talk until are only our voices and laughters echoed in the kfc. We quite chattering-boxes..so be it. Pretty funny!
Then, realizing many eyes are focalizing their lens onto us, so we make our way to econjaya! There, like usual, we went up and down, down and up ushering things till there's no more got to discover. Quite fatigue to tell you the truth. But, it isn't a waste, i end up my hunt by purchasing a long-sleeve shirt. I pretty like the pattern. And another penny went flying out again from my wallet.
At the end, before everbody head their own way again, we quench our dreaded thirst of ice-cream at a stall next to econjaya. Though it may not be as scrumptious as baskin robbins or even new zealand natural, but it's enough to chill my bone. Imagine, isn't that a pretty silly idea, eating ice-cream in the middle of dazzling clod rain??
Spending time with them is like a thousands years of memories. We adore each other,and nevertheless to say, we live in each other souls.
Remember, the moment when we were born, a time where joys were paralleled with tears, came to earth another human. And that moment too, we were taught life is race. And to win this race it's all depending on our luck. Things get easy whenever luck is on our side, isn't?? Different people may have distinct beliefs in luck, and so be it. No doubt, determination also one of the key ingredient to success, yet luck is the master of all. Let's say, we have tried our best in exam, we study hard even smart, we go for an extra class, we learn from masters, but, whenever luck isn't with us..we will plunge too at the end. See how vital is luck in the essence of our life. We may say luck comes within our effort but it didn't. Instead, pray and effort make luck even more stronger-the foundation of victory.
The predicament of luck itself are differ among other people and so do I. But i really hate this one when it comes to a sense where people aren't working hard for what they want, whilst easily saying let luck do and decide for them. Shuck, weren't they?? I may be harsh or even salacious but, if you kind of luck-dependent person like dependent sentence in english grammar, what can I say other than you're so wrong. With no help of effort and determination, you will never ever success too. You will be succeeded but in a little amount as your hardship. Sorry for being irritating and my out-of-my-mind antics, but that's the reality, you can't run from the clincher of success.
Monday, 27 December 2010
after several attempts to demolish my long hair by my parents, yesterday, they finally manage too, and what shock me the most is that not only me the one who's getting a haircut, but also joining me are my father and my brother.
so, proud to say, yesterday is the world "bald hair" day for my family.
sound funny, isn't??
sure, but poor me, my mission to not get a hair cut so that i will have half korean look then be ruined by mother.
it's just that not everyday, but i can say almost everyday my parents will talk on how my hair look like.
they say long hair make me look untidy and messy.
but, after all i have to admit in that as ever since i was a kid, my hair style would be short and mostly near bald.
i remember there's a time when i get a number 1 haircut, the predicament here is that the shortness of the hair are following numbers and 1 will be the shortest.
but, as i get older, i try to have a long hair, and perhaps can make a punk-evil hair style.
at the end, i fail and what is in return is the same hair style back then in school.
what matter most here is that..hair for some people is their crown where they can portray their throne.
but for me, important, hair is showing your personality..including attitude and sense of style.
undoubtedly, my parents are mostly right, and learn a lot from this.
as a teacher wannabe, really, i need a clean-cut and tidy look so that it would be convincing and deceiving look to teach other people.
come on, everyone didn't you know that teachers are role-model??
if we not show a good qualities, imagine what will happen to our students..
wouldn't that will be a disaster ending..totally yes.
at last, i really hope one day in future there will be hairstylist willing to makeover my hair..and that style will last forever!
Friday, 24 December 2010
every moment when I'm alone, my mind will escape away and start to think of this thing.
this has been clinging on me, especially on the back of my mind for such ages if i'm not mistaken.
and it has been the one that keep me going for tesl.
and this is also the reason why do i've to be strong with the changes..and whilst fortifying my adroitness to be an ardent teslian.
what i can say, in other sense, i feel like Tesl is a piece of me..if one piece is taken away, i will shatter into pieces and mostly broken in inside.
I'm not being a psychopath or even a stalker of myself, but i have to concede the fact that i have put my soul and myself in tesl-ingredients of my virtue.
you can say whatever you can, you have the right and shout it out, but when it rhythms into my ears, i will close it tight and slam it on the losing-end of yours.
this is my power, and inner power that is beyond your naked eye.
I've try myself to alleviate the snobbishness that has throned in me..but, it never fall apart.
you may say i , a kind of snobbish person, but, if i'm not, i will act like one on you.
get ready, you maybe fall into the hot soup.
you may get blisters, yet i will make sure it will remain forever.
Tuesday, 21 December 2010
Listen carefully..here's my resigned letter from being your KK for the next semester.
I've been thinking all this for quite some time, and it finitely mess up my brain.
And finally it comes to a sense where I believe how insanely dictator I'm acting.
So, to make things better, I decide to quit from being your KK for the next semester though you still need my service, but then, I can't stand anymore.
Yes, no doubt, I'm quite experience in this field, but, looking back at the time I rule, isn't that a big chaos, there so much many things i fail to settle and trust me, I'm not gonna make a good KK.
Without second thought, I really want to give some space to someone to replace my throne as I'm not gonna be eternal on my throne and there's gotta be someone else to live up this class.
Sunday, 19 December 2010
quite a long time haven't we met cyber-ly.
and this moment I would like to tell you all that my class, B.Ed TESL D is now available on blog!
in this cyber era, it's pretty weird for one not having either facebook or blog.
so, well, we are pretty sure a step forward in this multimedia thing.
and as a matter of fact, this is going to be another means of communication among the diligent D teslian.
so, do follow us. have a pleasant viewing!
Thursday, 16 December 2010
Have you ever heard of travel holiday to sun??
If it to space, yes we almost do but neither to sun
and some people may wonder if we can escape from earth to space, it means we can reach sun too..but then the truth is we can't.
the main crux is that the Distance.
in this case distance matters most.
And how far away from us is the sun?
Are we to answer just as we think, or just as we know?
On a fine summer day, when we can see him clearly,
it looks as if a short trip in a balloon might take us to his throne in the sky
and yet we know because the astronomers tell us so
that he is more than ninety-one millions of miles distant from our earth.
Ninety-one millions of miles!
It is not easy even to imagine this distance
but let us fancy ourselves in an express-train going sixty miles an hour without making a single stop.
At that flying rate we could travel from the earth to the sun in one hundred and seventy-one years
that is, if we had a road to run on and time to spare for the journey.
so, if you dare to take risk by taking up this challenge..why don't you try..and make a difference
and embark on a new astronomy history.
DARE MAKE A DIFFERENCE..AND..GO BEYOND YOUR MIND CAN
The next day started with a few clouds, obscuring the ray of sunlight I used as my wake up alarm for the summer. So I got up late, as I usually did on cloudy days. I took a shower, grabbed a t-shirt and some shorts to put on, and went out into the patio for some breakfast. Francesca d’Alessi was sitting at the table, buttering a slice of toasted bread.
As she looked up, I was struck by the color of her eyes. They were blue, luminous, like pools of aquamarine contrasting with her dark skin. She did not seem as beautiful as she looked in the movies, but there was something about her demeanor, which somehow pulled you in, even against your will. She extended her hand to me.
“You must be Cindy…happy to meet you, I’m Francesca.”
I shook her hand, ignored the Italianization of my name, and sat down at the table. I proceeded to eat some toast with jam and drink some coffee, but Francesca started in. She spoke to me in English, and her English was definitely superior to my Italian.
“So you don’t mind being here all alone for the summer?”
“No, actually I like it a lot!” I tried not to sound as if I was giving her a hint…
“Do you have friends on the island?”
What do you think!?
“Yes I do.”
“Are they nice?”
The grilling was really getting to me. I replied yes, and then she changed the subject.
“So, to get to the harbor, I just turn left on the road and walk? How far is it?”
“Not far, and besides you cannot get lost on the island. It’s too small. You need to take the ferry? “I was asking a hopeful question.
“I am meeting a friend at 10:30.”
“Then you better leave now…it takes about 20 minutes.”
A friend? Hell…was she going to bring Hollywood to the island? While Francesca was gathering her things to go, I went to the kitchen and interviewed Simone.
“Mrs. d’Alessi is meeting her friend Tomaso at the ferry. He will be here for two nights” she said.
I could not believe her nerve…I was being kicked out of what used to be my parents’ house, but had recently become mine, thanks to Sam’s nurturing help. So the whole thing had been arranged for Francesca to meet some boyfriend behind her husband’s back? I rolled my eyes, and grabbed the bike after kissing Sam on the cheek out of compassion, and telling her I would probably spend the day and evening with Ondine and the guys.
When I arrived at Ondine’s, she was doing summer homework with her tutor, and they let me join in. I aced the spelling dictation as usual, but sweated a little more for the math. I had missed the first few days of class in algebra, and still had not completely incorporated into my consciousness the idea that letters could be added or subtracted, even less obtained as a result.
We had sandwiches and cherries for lunch, and we were tying cherry stems into knots using only our tongues, when Bambi and Jean-Remy walked in.
“Hey you guys! What are you up to?”
“Nothing…what are you doing today?”
“We want to go fishing at Notre-Dame. Do you want to come?”
And off we went, on our bikes. Bambi had brought a fishing gun, and snorkel gear. I had borrowed mine from Veronica. I did not remember where mine was, and did not want to go back to the house and look for it.
Fishing did not mean sitting quietly and waiting for the fish to bite. Fishing meant hunting down the fish, and spearing them with harpoon guns or hand held tridents. Sometimes, we caught octopus and would pry the animal from the spear while it was grabbing at us with all tentacles. I had learned from a local kid how to turn the head inside out and beat out the ink before handing the octopus to the chef for lunch. I hated catching octopus and always hoped they were all busy somewhere else whenever we went fishing.
Jean-Remy caught some poor unsuspecting sand dab that day, and very soon we grew tired of looking at the sand bottom, and sat on the beach. Bambi started the conversation.
“Do you guys know that Francesca d’Alessi is spending the summer here? My dad saw her at the wharf this morning.”
“Oh, I know, I said sighing. She is actually staying at our house. I don’t think she is staying all summer however…”
All three of them looked at me stunned.
“And you were going to tell us when?”said Ondine.”What kind of a traitor are you?”
I rolled my eyes.
“She is supposed to be incognito. Besides, I want nothing to do with her…she’s like using our house to meet her boyfriend behind her husband’s back.”
“Her boyfriend? “ Said Bambi,” but Francesca d’Alessi is a dyke!”
Ondine was poking Bambi with her trident.
“What? Come on! How could you, little old you, of all people, know that?”
“I read an article in Cinemonde…she and Selena Hirschberg are doing it. I swear! There was a pretty hot picture of them together.”
Selena Hirschberg was the dark, intense, mysterious, Argentinian star who had created a sensation at the last Cannes Festival after her film won the Palme d’Or, by refusing all the interviews. This had driven the paparazzi crazy, and ultra grainy photos of Selena doing various menial tasks suddenly multiplied on the front pages of every single tabloid in Europe.
“You better beware, said Bambi pointing at me…she might attack you!”
I shrugged my shoulders…
“She’s not a dyke. Her boyfriend came today, his name is Tomaso.”
“Have you seen him? Maybe he’s a she...”
The joking continued as we all went back to Ondine’s parents, who had brought a whole batch of sea urchins.
When I arrived back at the house, it was still early. No one was home, and Sam had already retired to her cottage in the back of the garden. I sneaked into the guest room which had become Francesca’s. Things were quite messy in there, and I could see evidence of Tomaso’s presence, cuff links, and men sized sneakers. Various items of feminine and masculine clothing were strewn on the large bed.
I went back to my room, and picked up my mystery book, finally interested in the next clue. At some point I heard Francesca and Tomaso coming in, but I was already dozing off, so I turned off the light and fell asleep almost instantly.
I was flying in the middle of a flock of large birds, with long necks, like blue herons. The birds were flapping their wings and calling each other with the shrill cries of seagulls. We were all soaring above white clouds, and below us was the blue, infinite ocean. I was hanging on to one of them, feeling lighter than a feather, happy and comfortable. Suddenly, the bird plunged into a cloud with a vertiginous dip. The move broke my balance, and I started falling.
I woke up suddenly from my dream. I could still hear the bird sound. It was a soft, repeated moaning, which broke into a long, prolonged soft cry. The sounds were gentle but seemed uncontrollable, intense with sweetness, evoking pain or almost unbearable pleasure. This was no bird. I realized I was hearing Francesca and Tomaso making love, and the wings flapping was the sound of the headboard on the guest room bed hitting the wall, following their movements. Nothing but silence for a while. Then, the sound of laughter, and the moaning started again, punctuated by more laughter and a soft masculine voice, whispering in Italian.
No way could I sleep, with this racket going on. I got up, and went outside, realizing they had left the door open, and I did not have the nerve to go and close it for them. Outside, the moon was bright and the breeze was a little chilly. I sat on the steps on the other side of the patio, where I could not hear anything. I could see stars and some clouds, and the leaves of the wisteria were fluttering in the dark.
Without warning, an immense sadness came over me, to the point where tears came to my eyes. The loneliness was palpable, as I crossed my arms over my knees and waited until the swells within me subsided. It took a while. I could not get a handle on it nor pinpoint the cause of it. I started sniffling, and realized it was going to get cold. A small light went on behind the drapes in the room across the patio. Someone got up; I heard water running, more voices, and the sound of the door to the guest bedroom closing. The light went off.
Shivering, I crossed the patio and went back to my room. Safe in the warmth of my bed, I stayed awake for a while, listening. But all was quiet and I eventually went back to sleep.
p/s:to be continued..
Wednesday, 15 December 2010
One of these mornings
you’re going to rise up singing
spread your wings
and take to the sky…
“Summertime” like holiday.
It had started as such a good day. I sat on the bluff amongst the pines, looking at the view of the entire island all around me. The cicadas were so loud that their hypnotic cacophony made it hard to hang on to my thoughts. The sea was calm, with a few scattered white sails. I could see the little harbor, with pieces of the village around it. I recognized the Navy fort to my right, and the white beaches to the North, and tried in vain to spot my parent’s house off the Chemin du Langoustier. It felt so good to be out in the warm breeze, taking in the scent of hot pine resin, the sweet loneliness of being with myself and my dreams. One day, I would be up here with someone I loved, and we would kiss in the shadow and protection of the maritime pines, we would own the world.
My old bicycle was leaning on the trunk of a tall pine. The brakes were so bad, that my friends and I had bought some cheap sandals with high cork heels at the Porquerolles market, so we could drag our feet and use the soles to slow us down. I cautiously started down the trail, bouncing the tires over roots, skidding over the pine needles.
My parents had gone their separate ways, and had left me to spend the summer on the island. My father was working in Italy and my mother vacationing somewhere in Scandinavia. I enjoyed having the house to myself. Not quite to myself since I had Sam, my governess to take on all the hard work and boring tasks in the house, and take care of me. It was a great deal, and I appreciated every minute. The freedom was tangible, almost unbearable, and I could only hope I could summon the experiences to make it unforgettable.
Riding through the village, bouncing on all the rocks, I took the one paved road to the left, back to the house. I had worked up an appetite, and was looking forward to sitting out in the courtyard, eating Sam’s delicious food and looking at the bees dancing around the wisteria. I was reading a mystery. I always liked to read while having lunch. At night I would usually discuss the day with Sam.
After parking the bicycle in the service entrance, I knew right away something was wrong. Sam looked worried.
“Cindy! Your mother called!” She said.
“Is she coming?” I said, with a mixture of hope and fear.
On one hand, I was hopeful maybe she was taking enough of an interest in her progeny to come and spend some time with me. But I was also afraid she would come home and start taking away my precious independence.
“No, but she has invited Mrs. d’Alessi to stay here for a week”
I was crestfallen. Francesca d’Alessi was a distant friend of my mother’s, and I also suspected a former lover of my father’s. She was a well known Italian actress currently living in Hollywood.
She was married to Marco d’Alessi, a producer who was much older than her, but who seemed to have been very instrumental in the rise of her career.
I could not believe my mother had the nerve to impinge on my freedom without even coming back herself.
“Why, why is she coming? Doesn’t she have enough houses already? Why does she have to come here?”
“Your mother said she had business in France, she needed the rest, and she wants to be incognito.”
“Fudge! Whatever…”I said.
Sam frowned at the word. I still could not believe it! One whole week!
“When is she coming?”
“Today. Mr. Vernet is bringing her at 3:00.”
“Oh right, like she can’t take the ferry like everyone else…give me a break!”
I liked Francesca. I had never met her, but I had seen some of her movies. I thought she was beautiful, though I could not at the time really appreciate whether she was a good actress or not. She had dark skin, very blue eyes, a perfect face and a flawless body with (what I admired most) straight hair, of a non-descript color with blonde highlights in typical Hollywood fashion. Some of the films, especially the ones directed by the Italian New Wave, were I have to admit, slightly above my head. She looked good in black and white though. Right now, however, I hated her.
Since my father worked in the film business, I had met many famous actresses and actors throughout my fourteen years, and always found them to be extremely boring in person, especially from the point of view of a kid. They seemed to always listen to themselves talk, and usually did the most stupid cutesy things to try to make me smile. I regularly gave them murderous looks, and ran away to my room.
The idea of having to contend with “La d’Alessi” for a whole week made me want to pull out all of my mother’s roses and trample them until nothing was left. I decided I would not have anything to do with her, and continue living my life as close to the way it had been so far this summer as possible. So there.
I ate my lunch distractedly. I was not even interested in finding out the next clue in my book, nor did I care at the moment about who was the murderer. Let him or her go free. Let him or her kill them all for all I care. Once they are all dead, we will know for sure who done it. Sam was busy cleaning rooms, making shopping lists, working hard. I was furious at my mother.
At 2:30, I made my escape. I hopped on the bike, rushed to my friends’ house in the village, and summoned the troops to spend the afternoon at Plage d’Argent. It was me and “the girls”, Ondine and Veronica, and “the boys” Jean-Pierre and Jean-Remy. Veronica was older than her sister Ondine, and did not join us very often. So it was really Ondine and me and the boys, who were brothers. I liked them all, but had a special feeling for Jean-Pierre, whose nickname was of all things, Bambi. I could imagine the name was left over from when he was a chubby toddler, and maybe it was going to follow him into old age. I had a crush on Bambi, and I loved to watch him. He was skinny, but quite strong for a fifteen year old. He had blond hair, curly in places, and it always fell in front of his eyes. He was tanned from being constantly out in the sunlight in a bathing suit. He had the looks of an angel, and the manners of a bad boy. This was probably what attracted me, but who knows… Bambi incidentally, did not return my feelings.
So Ondine and I went to pick up the boys, and off we went. We played a game where we would pull out the old canoe we had hidden at the Plage d’Argent. The canoe leaked, and the game was to paddle as fast and as far as possible before the canoe finally sank. Then, we had to drag the canoe on the bottom, turn it over to empty it and start all over again. Bambi liked to have Ondine as his partner, and I always ended up with Jean-Remy. I did not like paddling with Bambi anyway, as he always yelled at me. My favorite partner whenever she joined was Ondine’s sister Veronica. She knew how to drop the competition aspect, and pretend we were on an island in the Pacific, singing and paddling slowly in unison until we sank.
After all our exertions, we would lie on the silver sand in full sunlight and discuss everything from our parents, to the latest news. We made fun of the people we called tourists. We had houses, we did not stay in hotels, we were locals, yet in our minds slightly above of the real locals, those who lived on the island all year round.
A good day was when Bambi paid some attention to me, other than mocking or yelling. Today was a good day. Bambi even showed me his new zippo lighter.
Francesca wanted to be incognito, so I felt I had to respect her wishes. I mentioned I was going to have to deal with an unwelcome guest, but I did not say who it was.
“Bummer! “said Ondine…“why don’t you come to our house for dinner tonight? We’re having fish, as usual, but you are welcome!”
“Thanks, I will!”
What a relief not to have to face the awkward situation of whether I was welcome to eat with Mrs. d’Alessi or not.
So I called Sam from Ondine’s parents’ house in the village, and told her I would not be home for dinner.
“Is she here?”
Obviously, Sam was not free to talk.
“Is she going to have dinner at home?”
“OK, see you tomorrow morning! Good night, good luck…”
I had a good time with Ondine and Veronica and their parents, and biked home as slowly as I could, as close to midnight as I could.
NOW the bright morning-star
Comes dancing from the east
And leads with her The flowery May
Who from her green lap throws The yellow cowslip
And the pale primrose.
That dost inspire Mirth
And warm desire
Woods and groves are of thy dressing
Hill and dale
Doth boast thy blessing.
Thus we salute thee with our early song
And welcome thee
And wish thee long.
and salamualaik' all!
In my view, i found that Friendship is essentially the same bond, whether it unites persons of intellect and refined tastes, or those more unfortunate ones, who, perhaps, have no conception of their mission in the world, or of their duty to society.
Its manifestations may be wholly different, but the two friendships will have some points in common.
In both instances the friends are drawn close together and are united by that bond which has been so beautifully written about throughout the ages.
Ever since I enter IPG, I have bumped into so many great people called as friends.
They are certainly becoming my second family as we spend most of the time together, having meal together, and most of the time, doing assignment together.
They are the place where I share my joy and sorrow; a place where my tears are swept away by their smiles and laughters.
And thus so called as My Very Very Best Friends~
What can i say..trio of them are very fun to be with. With Aiman and Faiz, we do our assignment. We have been team-mates for every assignment except for social studies, where we have to be separated. Every minutes, we spend times together. We shared almost everything except for girlfriend thingy.
Though they are coming from different classes, in which Hazwan is in TESL B and Valentine is in TESL C, our relationship is so closed knit. As time passes, our bond grows more than a friendship..shall I call it as Family? YES..it is. With them, we do something stupid..and without them, I feel lost and deserted.
Shall I call them TOTALLY SPIES?? Of course it is. They are actually my classmates and I found we are as closed as brother-and-sister. We do almost everything together..study together..sharing secrets..and mostly sharing hottest and latest gossip, in which I'm very expert in it. To be friend with them is such another moment in time..a time that I want to remain immortal.
All I can sum up here My dearest friend,
Be true to thy friend.
Never speak of his faults to another, to show thy own discrimination
But open them all to him, with candor and true gentleness
Forgive all his errors and his sins, be they ever so many
But do not excuse the slightest deviation from rectitude.
Never forbear to dissent from a false opinion
Or a wrong practice, from mistaken motives of kindness
Nor seek thus to have thy own weaknesses sustained
For these things cannot be done without injury to the soul.
p/s: i'm proud to be friend of yours..and am looking forward to see you all in the next sem..with love..arsyad.
Monday, 13 December 2010
Every night and every second we dream.
Whatever we dream is, it's definitely a good mind-therapy.
Dreams are expressions of thought, feelings, and awareness that are
represented through the creation of sensory environments in our minds.
The sleep process allows the brain to sort out the events of the day, to put the
various stresses in perspective and heal the brain and body and emotions
from the day’s wear and tear.
So sometimes your dreams simply reflect what you have been focusing on
during the day, and give you a vivid picture while your subconscious is busily
“filing away” the facts and feelings of the day.
Have you ever spent the day playing a computer game, or completing
crosswords, or spent many hours driving, and when you close your eyes to
sleep, you can’t get the “picture” of what you saw while doing those things,
out of your head?
Some dreams are what is called “organic” which simply means it has a
biological cause, and could even have been the result of what you ate that
Other times, your dreams may reflect issues that are worrying you, or that you
sub-consciously need to “deal” with, even if you aren’t really aware of
anything that may be troubling you.
And yet, the best dreams ever is to be what you dream.
Dream of what you dream because it will bring you where and what you want to.